There’s this woman, let’s call her Spanners, and she’s a bad influence on me. We met online (World of Warcraft, baby!) years ago and have remained in sporadic Facebook contact ever since, because we both think the other is cool or we want to look like we have more friends than we really do or we just got too lazy to delete each other or something along those lines. Spanners is also a crafter and a blogger, and ever since I took up knitting she’s been a source of virtual encouragement. Until now, it was all friendly.
Last week the unthinkable happened. Crafting turned into a competitive sport with the announcement that Spanners was learning to knit on DPNs before me and had successfully crocheted an owl. I’m falling behind, and that will not stand!
In true overly competitive style I immediately hopped onto the internet (not literally) and demanded it show me a nice set of DPNs and some non-pricey beginner crochet hooks. Cost be damned, I cannot let her win. It’s my birthday next month and there’s a long standing tradition whereby I get access to gifts an average of a month early, so now seems like a good time to convince someone else to pay to arm me for the coming battles. As well as the new needles and hooks I’m also taking the opportunity to stock up on yarn for my next 8 million* projects so that I’ll never be bored ever again, and some better stitch markers since mine are too fat and keep leaving ladders in everything.
Over the coming weeks I plan to knit a pair of fingerless gloves on my shiny new DPNs, crochet a BETTER owl than Spanners, and then try and think of something else more impressive to put me in the lead. Perhaps my sunny lace shawl will do it. Awe-inspiring project ideas welcome, I’m thinking maybe Psychotic Tomato, just because.
(Yeah, I know crocheting isn’t knitting. The name “KnitWarz” amuses me so much I just don’t care.)
* slight exaggeration, but not by much